I wish I
could paint an accurate pictures with my words to help you understand the
complex, broken yet precious homes and lives that the children I work with come
from.
As an intro
of my day involved in their world began around 3:15 when I got off the TTC bus
and walked through the neighborhood to the school yard just past the rows and
rows of Toronto Community Housing, all the same bricks upon bricks. The only
difference I see between them as I walk through the rows of brick buildings
lining the road is the marks left behind on the bricks of the corner unit from
the targeted shooting to that home just over two weeks ago. What blows my mind
is across the street is the home where some of our children from camp sleep and
live.
As I cross
over the road I notice two guys, dressed in dark clothing, moving slowly down
the sidewalk. Yes, that description sounds awfully stereotypical, but one of
these young guys hardly reaching the age of 20 is wanted by police regarding
the previous shooting mentioned. Young boys who lacked any form of good role
models while being raised in an environment that says fight back, hit harder
and if that doesn't work hit with a gun.
It’s a
disgusting cycle of kids learning from kids and never being taught forgiveness,
love, how to communicate and certainty not unity. As these guys wonder through
the neighborhood they walk past little children walking home from school and
this is what is normal for them.
As I enter
the school grounds I am met by many of a children, eager for hugs and love. I
pull one girl aside, pray fully asking God to be softening her heart. She
slapped a kids hard on Friday, left the boy in tears and now I had to explain
to her the consequences of her actions which meant suspending her from camp for
the day. She’s a young girl, brought up in a world where you hit and slap when
you are frustrated because the other person is asking for it and so it is
justified.
I was
quickly pulled into the next situation as two girls came running towards me
informing me that there was a fight happening on the other side of the field,
but quickly including that if anyone asks they were not the ones to tell me.
The fear of doing what we consider right is one that is instilled in them at
such a young age because of the potential consequences laid on you for being a
tattle tale.
Things calm
down, fight gets under control and we arrive to camp. I find the boy that had
been slapped and we sit in the office for the next 45 minutes talking through
what happened. His words caused my heart to ache as he sincerely spoke of the
hatred he knew the other kids all had for him. About how He has been slapped,
kicked and punched often by many of them, how he is used to it and believes
that he in fact deserves it.
The
twisted lifestyle of what so many of these kids are being raised and taught in causes me to grieve. And yet when they are older and acting out of what was started
many years before and demonstrated by their neglectful mothers, absent fathers
and gang member role models we so often lack the compassion and love that they
desperately need.
I don’t get
it all and I certainly don’t have it all together. I don’t know how to love the
girl that has to care for her siblings because he mom is never home, I don’t
know how to untangle a heart that has been neglected for years upon years. I am just very thankful that I have a
father who knows, he sees who cares and who is capable of transforming work in
each of their hearts and lives.
Please continue to pray for the work of UrbanPromise Toronto as we seek to reach children and raise them into leaders who restore their communities.
If you would like to take an active role in support me in this ministry by being a monthly financial support I encourage you to send me an email so we can connect @ janelle@urbanpromise.com or to visit the website @ www.urbanpromise.com
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